Friday 10 October 2008

The South Asian Shoe Shuffle

or Sri Lankans and the truth - mutually exclusive.
I like Sri Lankans, I have yet to find a people (at the risk of a sweeping generalisation) that are as unfailing polite as the Ceylonese, even when they are robbing you or refusing to pay your fees, they do so with such curtesy.
However, they seem to have a problem with the actualite. Give them the possibility of telling a whopper and the truth and it is the whopper every time. Even when it harms them.
Two recent appeals made my heart bleed (well that maybe overstating the case, a little), both concerned old women who wished to join their families in the United Kingdom. Their families were hard working and conscientious, and British.
There is a provision, in fact there are a number in the Immigration Rules (Statement of Changes to the Immigrations Rules HC395 (as amended)), whereby relatives can join family in the United Kingdom, particularly if the family are not dependant on the state.
Unfortunately, both had decided to gain entry to the United Kingdom as visitors and then apply to stay. Unfortunately, both appellants not only were averse to the truth, but looked when questioned as they were attempting to drink a bowl of sour milk which had been sprinkled with old liver. They also refused to answer my questions, preferring to answer questions that had not been asked...
"When you came to the United Kingdom as a visitor, did you intend to return to Sri Lanka?"
(Correct answer being yes. Next question, what made you change your mind. Answer my son etc..)
Actual answer...
"I am an old woman and the Sri Lankan army blew up my neighbours house fifteen years ago and then I was asked to join the insurgency..."
and so on.
Perhaps unsurprising the appeals failed. Ah well I suppose they can always puruse a career in the insurgency. Not too sure how well they would fare in stripping an AK 47 with dodgy hands, eyes, feet (?) etc.

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